From Jeff Cronenweth getting his moody lighting on to Trent Reznor and Karen O ripping through Zeppelin’s “Immigrant Song”, this teaser for David Fincher’s American remake of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is right around one of the coolest things I’ve EVER seen.

Reports say this is a leaked trailer bootlegged from a U.K. theater, hence the shaky camera. But, the trailer is preceded by an MPAA logo, leading me to believe it could be part of some kind of viral marketing campaign from Sony. Perhaps it’s the work of Lisbeth Salander herself. Bwhahaha!

After 2009’s Last House on the Left and last year’s I Spit on Your Grave, I must say that I’m pretty much over the home invasion sub-genre of horror films, not to mention horror remakes in general. Realistically, how many different ways can you tell a story set in the woods wherein depraved criminals commit heinous acts of violence on unsuspecting victims, only to have those unsuspecting victims find the heinous violence within themselves and exact revenge on their attackers?

Still, even my father insists that the original Straw Dogs - which had Dustin Hoffman in the James Marsden role - is one of the greats. As “been there, done that” as this trailer feels, that opinion alone convinces me to give this one a shot.

I’ll more-than-likely see it, but Jesus this sub-genre of horror is depressing. Can’t we go back to the days where it was just a bunch of hot kids running around being chased by a masked serial killer, but still having time to be quirky and spout off tongue-in-cheek dialogue? April can’t come soon enough.

I don’t know how I feel about this. I mean, I like that they’re going for a darker and more realistic look for the turtles, but motherfucker just looks old to me. This is not a dude that skateboards through a sewer while munching down on pizza and butt-kicking a bunch of foot soldiers. I now lump myself in with all those die-hard Transformers fans: Stop fucking with my childhood, Hollywood!